What great Junk!

Let me "Stage" this for you... It's Saturday evening. Zac and I are throwing a dinner party for our friends Amy and Jeremy. It's their first time over to our house for dinner. My mom (who's still here visiting from Portland) and I spend all afternoon cleaning the house and getting everything PERFECT. My dad has been gone for a "little longer than expected" and arrives just a few seconds before our guests. I graciously offer our guests a seat in the living room and hand them nice little summer drinks of juice spritzers. We all sit around the living room to make small talk before dinner. We're talking about highly intelligent things like Genetics, Cloning, War and World Peace...NOT! We were really talking about 'The Bachelor', Dog Training, Kid Training, etc.

So, out of nowhere my dad says he picked up a "little something" to add some additional class to the dinner party. I'm thinking maybe it's a bottle of wine. Maybe it's a fancy dessert. Nope... I forgot. This is MY DAD we're talking about.

He goes out to his car (a brand new Cadillac SUV) and pulls out one of the craziest things I've ever seen and plops it smack down in the living room. Everyone looks at it. Zac moans "Oh my God." My mom is laughing so hard she can hardly breath. Amy and Jeremy look at it... then at each other... and start laughing. Then Jeremy says "if they don't want that I do!" That's all it took. We were all in tears laughing about our "little something" that brought some "class" to the night.

Here's Dad Posing with his gift to Zac and I

Yes you're seeing that correctly. It's an anatomically correct lower torso of a woman (molded out of plastic). She stands on a pedestal. She is quite voluptuous in her "junk in the trunk" area. Of course, the guys were going crazy. They came up with all sorts of crazy idea. The first was to make her a plant stand in our backyard.

Here's Zac posing with Miss Plastic after putting a plant on her torso

Here are Jeremy and Amy posing with Miss Plastic.. notice Jeremy isn't looking at the camera... he's looking and touching her "junk in the trunk".

Next came the great idea to fill her legs with lights so that Miss Plastic could light up at night. All we had were some white Christmas lights... so we strung them down the small hole and into her legs. We all eagerly awaited nightfall.

Bryant and Miss Plastic

Soon after that, someone came up with great idea that the ladies need to compare "junk" with Miss Plastic .

Here are Mom and Amy posing to see who's junk looks best. Hands down... Miss Plastic is the winner. (But I bet she's not 60 years old like my mom either!)So, I bet you're wondering what we did with Miss Plastic. Well, after the dinner party (which was a raving success) we decided we definitely needed Miss Plastic where we could enjoy her. Our neighbors probably think we're crazy... but we decided to place her prominently in our yard. We have plans to decorate her each holiday with different attire. Anyone have a red, white and blue thong we can borrow for 4th of July????